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AngelDemon's profile

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Location: Logan City 
DOB: Thursday, 24th April, 1980
Site: Not Entered
Status: Currently suffering :(
Joined:  22nd January, 2017
Posts: 0
I am a 36yo mother of 3 and chronic cluster headache sufferer. My condition has predominately ruled my existance for the best part of 23yrs. The headaches started for me in my early teens and for several years were undiagnosed due to my inability to accuratly discribe what i was experancing to doctors. On most occassions doctor would ask me what i hoped they could do for me my response stop the vomiting so i can keep the panadol down long enough for then to work. On averqge since they began i have suffered no less the 6 during daylight hours and 2 the wake me from my sleep of a nite and thats at best. During periods I have endured as many as 8-10 daily upto 4 at night. I have only ever experianced 2 natural remission periods both of which began within 3days of contraption and ended within the same time frames after giving birth. After the birth of my youngest daughter I began to experiment with mood stabilizers such as anti depressants doctors also explored other avenues such as attempting to fool my body into believing it was pregnant. This followed the 10-15yrs of the usual perscribed medications used to either pervent or elevate pain. Form lythum to veramilpil i believe it was called which saw my blood pressure drop so low after doctors revived me i had to remain hospitalized for weeks before doctors were able to raise it back up to a point where i could stand quickly without fainting. After that and the softening of my tooth enamel due to the corrosive properties of the stomach fluid yellow froth i would spew up during every attack and the i was now faced with yet another health concern. due to the excessive medication precriribed being used i had suffered irreparable damage to my bowl and was now suffering with a malabsorbortion issue. Something warned could lead to sarossos of the liver. It was around this same time i decided to instead use heat and cold packs to distract from the sudded onset of pain while treating instead the signs of shock my body would experiance due to the level of pain felt on the left side of my head 8-10times daily and again 2-4times each and every night. Until recently i have discribed my life not as being lived as having existed. I for many many years feared leaving the house for fear of being to far from a microwave or freezer. Now however i have found an effective but controversial treatment that has provided almost constant relief. I no longer have to experiance a single attack provided i do maintain a regular dose and attempt to maintain a certain level of this highly illegal substance in my system at all times. In the event that i have been unable to do so i can with certainty expect headaches begin again within a 3day period just like my natural remission periods and with a frequancy and sererity of those i experience during my darkest days. I am reluctant in offering people the name of my cure and my chosen delivery method but feel due to the lack of understanding of the condition and treatments available that actually show noticable inprovement in sufferes lives its a must. I do implore anyone who decides to follow in my footsteps and begin any form of self medication they first explore other options available with doctors first. Prehaph doctors can perscribe a dirivitive or similar alternative. While i have found relief moments after administering this poentent narcotic and have even halted a headache with a single increased does i have due to the nature of the drug forced to make major lifestyle choices that I made for all the right reasons but regrettably aslo have to live with now. I have had to walk among undersibelals rub shoulders with the underworld and bare witness to the core of our decay. I have watch as others people touched by the substance change from good people to putrid examples of our species. I fell in love with a serial sex addict and codependnt addicted to my cure who selfishly ripped the hearts out of his sons and mine from our chests each and every week. When he would leave to fuel his vens and find new female online friend's. I moved on to bigger and better younger and dumber 6ft7 20 something brooding Turk with his dark features and dazzling smile i found myself captivated to the point i barely noticed the severity of or the complexity of his drug induced psychosis until he was confronted by police in my front yard about to get taizered by each. Informing them that he was infact a chemicle computer that had fallen into a chemical coma sent to deliver me messages recieved by him telepathically from the octapus which if i understood correctly was a satellite on a trajectory like or following that of Haileys commet. He spoke incessantly at me all night.long or mouthed the words, chanting was the name i gave this behaviour which he later explained as doing his budget. A female friend sort my assistance to stop her use after numourous hospitaliation warned her off it also suffering server psychosis complaining she couldnt breathe because she was surrounded by people that didnt like trees and proceeded to administer perfume into her nasal passage. I myself suffered a breif moment that saw me speaking in rhymes while voices thundered inside my head trying to dig parasites out of my ears using almost all of my pinky finger. The point i am trying to make is while i can see the upside Relief i see the downside Stability as well. I have found that with maintaining a healthy life balance eating and sleeping and continueing normal daily activities betters one chances at maintaining one mental stability. I beileve and pass on my believe to any regular user of this drug that failing to maintain regular sleeping patterns will increase mental instability. Reason i believe being due to the brains tendency to process short term memories into long term memories and stores them away while we slumber away. Any extended periods where sleep is skipped sometime for days at a time we begin to develop gaps in our memory. This creats a state of increased confusion which progresses to diminished cognative funtions and noticable irreparablity. I have even witnessed some people almost complete loss of conrol of motor functions flailing about as if their bodies have torrets. While i have found the illegal substance known by the street names Meth, Ice ,Shard & Rock methylamphetamine for me has been the only drug i have found to have any effectiveness preventing and even stopping in its tracks an attack with a single dose. Intravenious injection of a dose no more then 0.01g administered each morning sees me begin my day with that energy and love for life expected of any 5yo excited to get out and explore the world. My friends have heard my explain how my life began at the end of the mayam calander 2012 the same year i found meth but they will also be able to inform u of regreats i voice often that i have wasted what turns out were my final years wjth people not friends tainted and rotting along with society engrossed in addiction feigning for their next hit when all i really wanted to be was a better more active and pleasent mum for my 3 beautiful daughters Logan 19 Breanna 7 and Isabelle 5 who only got to know irritable tired cranky nasty yelling mummy always tired always with a headache. This week i have spent tying up lose ends as come wednesday 25/01/17 I am to face numerous charges police have compiled against me. The very same officers because of my lifestyle choices found it easy to victimize me. Physical abuse sexual abuse and seemly endless hassessment has plagued my life NO! dismal existance as has other factors like in the past year of all 26 of us known to have lived at what we affectionatly dubbed The KrabShak 5 men & 2 women left via a correctional facility with an all expences paid government holiday as their parting gift. 3 men & 2 women work to achieve what once came naturally the ability to accept life on lifes terms. 2 men and 3 women found comfort within the cousioned walls of a local facility. 2 men menaged to up & fly under police radars. 6men await a verdict and subsequent destinalion while 1 of my blokes stand here besidw me as I await my verdict and possible incarceration less then a week away. Ive been told by certain officers they will be pushing for a maxium penalty 20yrs while others have attempted to lure me into a false sense of security making out like i can expect a fine. It doesnt matter though how long i get my intentions are clear i refuse to indure while repaying a dept i now owe society for the relatively pain free life others are issued at birth. Instead i expect wednesday be the last day this 5yo bounces out of bed full of love and a sense of adventure excited by the wonders life has installed for her.

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